Second bananas... I am referring to married men... my pet name for those who do not like using condoms that's why they are dads too. LOL!
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| My business partner at Time in Manila, Pav Parotte at his finest modeling career... only for my blog. |
My friend, Mond J. Ortiz a.k.a the guy who doesn't want to be a second banana just posted an interesting thought on Facebook and it goes like this.... "There are some women I know who are "third parties" and they are aware of it. And they are in a relationship with a guy who is married with kids and a wife. I am just wondering whats going on in the back of the heads of these "third parties". What motivates them to stay in the relationship? Why can't they just choose a single man instead of being with a married man with a wife and kids? Does their conscience even disturb them? Are they aware that they are actually destroying a family? I just cant seem to comprehend third parties because I would never allow myself to be a second banana."
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| Pav Parotte... a high target for women looking for second bananas. Disclaimer: Mate... don't kill me if your email gets flooded with proposals from women, okay? ;-) |
Many of Mond's friends were also baffled with his post as to why some women go for married men. They gave their insights and opinions... all were very interesting and so, I posted my following opinions based on my past conversations with single and married friends:
Some women do go for married men and they do so for a variety and number of reasons that can go up to 101:
1. Don't Hate The players, Hate the Game.
Some women like this and they perceive of this as a game. Yes, these women enter into relationships with the married men who attracts them to see what he will do to screw up the lives of his wife and children to be with her. It's the same as with a man or woman who dates someone who's already in a relationship. It's a competition to some. Sick, yes... but coming between relationships to some is like a goddamn sport.
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| Just modeling for this blog... Mr. Marcus (a committed guy) and Pav (a very very committed guy) |
2. The Thrill of the Chase.
Some women always want they can't have. It's a thrill for them... an excitement that gives off endorphin or endogenous + morphine. Endorphin can either bring out natural pain or fight stress. I'm saying that maybe some women are wired that way to endure the natural pain of being in a complicated relationship whether it be short term or long term. For some, it helps them fight stress. Going for a married man becomes a challenge for them. After all, it is harder to gain the attention of someone already committed and in love.
3. Second Bananas are Safe.
A married man for these women seems to be always more agreeable than the disengaged one. These women think that it is all safe with the married men... they can exert all their powers of pleasing without suspicion and that no harm can be done. And since these men are married, they can hardly demand a high level of commitment from women who go for them.
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| Me and Pav always have this funny moments together at Time. Nothing more than business. Just to make it clear... I do not have an intimate relationship with this guy. I have a business affair with him. |
4. Going with the Flock.
Some women have a this herd mentality and they want what other women want. Yeah they go for the same cow that others want.
5. Great Ego Booster.
Yes, it's all about self-achievement similar to number 2 because married men are harder to entice thus; doing so is like an ego boost. It's like singing the song from Pussycat Dolls "Don't cha wish you're girlfriend is hot like me". The fact that these women lured married men, they think they are hotter because men choose to sleep with them.
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| The incriminating photo that I may be judged as a woman who goes for married men.. |
6. It is an Earnest Business.
Life can be hard and so the grand plot of blackmailing becomes a business enterprise. Some women go for married men so they can set an entrapment. They target men who are so-called "loyal" to their wives and with perfect timing, gather evidences to trap the men and solicit huge amounts of money in exchange for silence. Ah well... silence is indeed golden.
7. Ain't Saying She's a Gold Digger but She Ain't Messin' with no Broke Nigga.
These women perceive of married men as good providers... in the monetary essence. They want money, jewelries, expensive shoes, bags, cars, etc. and that all of it comes from being a mistress without the wifely obligations.
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| This photo proves that Pav can not be someone that women (who likes married men) should chase. He has this bromance with Mr. Marcus. |
8. The Right Love at a Wrong Time.
It is inevitable for some women to love and be loved by someone at a wrong time. We are all human beings and love... genuinely sometimes just happen at a wrong time. These women couldn't help it. We can't beg them to stay away if they don't want to leave and be with someone else. This is what love is all about... Sacrifice!
I believe that the number of reasons behind this baffling topic can rise to 101 or more if we clearly and further dwell on it but then I also believe that we should let these people be. Seriously. It's their own lives. To some of us, maybe we are wired to stay single forever, married, in a complicated relationship, etc... and to some, they are just wired to be in a starstruck relationship like Romeo and Juliet. We all exist in this world with various purposes in life and to know what life is, is to really live it on our own.
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| Ah... my favorite couple... Pav and my sweet friend, Anne! |
I cannot truly be judgmental as to why some people go for the married ones. Life for me is a beautiful waste of time and time is a beautiful waste of life... we should just waste our time and have the time of our lives... that's all that matters.
Thanks to E.B.E. and Vincent Garrucho for the great shots of my friend Pav who willingly agreed to model with me, Mr. Marcus and his wife Anne for this particular blog. Thanks Mond Ortiz for making me write this. Thank you, Pav... you're the best banana for this topic! :-)