Whenever I am torn between things especially ones that involve money, I always remember what my daddy used to tell me... "Stop living for tomorrows that may never come and start living for today but keep in mind, money isn't everything."
There were many instances in my life that I had to make the choice to go with the money and I had to constantly battle my way up the corporate ladder only to find that an honest worker like me would wish the competition would die suddenly and/or that she gets diseases so she will stop screwing every single client she has + including mine to get the account and beat me on my own marketing skills. Eventually I gave up realizing it wasn't the world that I was meant to be in.
I wasn't living paycheck to paycheck back then but I never had a peace of mind even if the money that I was working for, meant to have the things I wanted in life... a home for family, a home to raise a child in, a decent car with driver and no monetary problems. Everything just didn't feel right and that's when I somehow realized what daddy meant.
Thinking now about some friends who made their dreams...
One female friend offshore finds it having a ball with getting all the grand material things she ever wanted in life only to realize in the end she has a thousand of friends who are actually strangers because she lost all her real friends back then because of her vanity along the way. She is still searching for her own happiness.
Three male friends who made it rich than they could ever imagine finds themselves desiring, wanting and marrying young, beautiful women... women who would love them for their money. Two of them got cheated upon by their wives while they were away and the other one's wife leaped off their building because she thought she'd had a calling that she could actually fly on her own... and she did but straight down (oh, drugs!). These men developed a penchant for fakes and got the hang of it till now. Trophy wives... trophy girlfriends... what's the real trophy to be bragged about here? Fast forward... Hugh Hefner in the making but would there actually be real women in their lives to truly take care of them when they are sick and old? Think about the word... escrow!
One male friend moved away from his country, got a great job, got married out of loneliness in a strange country and is still stuck with a wife who's more than a stranger from the beginning of their relationship.
One female friend strike it rich and came back buying handsome men... literally for their love that she ended up not finding true love and is still very much alone. She aged big time for her actual age.
Another male friend who did good in life became similar to the three guys I mentioned earlier. Desiring, wanting and buying bimbos. Every single "hottie" seems to have a price tag in his eyes to the point of buying them grand things for their attention and for meaningless sex. Pathetic... he can't seem to realize that there are a little-lesser-endowed women out there who can actually love him for what he is and not for what he has.
Two female friends somehow made it offshore after so many years and came back to their families with their own children growing up to be total strangers to them.
I needed to think about these friends because sure... money can bring happiness to the table... money can get me anything tempting... money can secure me and my kid a great future... but if it all entails me to go further away to a strange land, be alone, work for richness, letting go of what I want to do for the rest of my life and not seeing much of my kid grow (as if it is not already enough that he is an hour's flight away from me) then I would have to say "no".
I know I got one heck of a choice ahead of me and that I pray that I can find peace in the road that I choose to take. I know that either way, they are good choices for me but the thing is, I know what I want in life. I know what I can do. I am a simple, funny, happy and contented woman who finds peace in everything that I do. Money isn't everything.
Writing this reminded me of what daddy said and now I see both ends of the spectrum. Yes... I am now making my choice... a choice which my heart is telling me it is the right one for now.
For my two great friends and bosses, Ed & H... I am staying.... for there are far more valuable things here in my life that money can never buy and that includes your friendship, faith, trust and confidence in me! Let's roll!!!
For Christine... let's do what we discussed yesterday and let's roll too!!!
To TimeinManila... It's time!!!
To Cody... I may not be able to give you everything you want in life but this decision is all for you. I love you with my all life!!!
To daddy in heaven... you raised me well... Thank you... I miss you and I love you!!!